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Interview with kinkster Rubber Toy

“It just means true freedom”

© Rubber Toy

Hello Rubber Toy, nice to have you here for this interview. Can you please describe the situation for kinky people in the region of the Middle East, where you’re from?
First of all I have to say it’s not as bad as some people think. Many of us live in a conservative society where people are not open enough to some things, so that will have it’s consequences on them: for example not talking freely about things like that. For me it’s just there are almost no kinky people here. On the other hand, nobody cares what you want to do when you do it, if you are not doing something inappropriate in public.

What does it mean to be gay in your country?
As I said, it’s a mostly conservative society here, so the term “gay” isn’t used much, regardless to the fact that there are a lot of people who like boys. Most people wouldn’t talk about it much, neither about their sexual life in general. That’s another reason why there is no specific term for that. It is looked at as a bad thing, especially if you are from a religious family, because you know most religions are against being gay in a way or another. But if you are from a different culture or foreigner then almost nobody cares. Some people wouldn’t care, regardless if you are religious or not though.

How is the infrastructure with gay and kinky bars. Where do you buy your rubber?
To be honest I have never looked it up here so I can’t tell you if there are any gay or club bars, but a guy from the UK who used to live here told me once that there is a secret gay club he use to go to, other than that I’m not sure. There gear and rubber I get online from different countries and different stores, mostly the UK though.

What does fetish mean to you?
Hmm interesting question, I have experienced the feeling of having a fetish since an early age I can say, and what I can tell about it that is every person has an inner hidden part of their personality, in a way or another, that has to come out sometimes in different forms, whether you want it or not. So having a fetish is one of those hidden parts in my personality and when it comes out, it just makes me feel deeply connected to my inner true self and of course it brings the joy and fun with it. It just means true freedom as it always felt amazing and true to express it and is always such a relief of what has been kept hidden inside. Basically I can say it’s a magical connection between the “inner you” and the outer world when it comes out and being practiced.

© Rubber Toy

Which personal fetishes do you have?
I can’t say I have a very long fetish list but it’s decent I think, to mention some of it. I’m mainly into rubber but also have other fetishes and interests like bondage, feet, socks, sneakers, gloves, hoods, gags, as well as breath play, sensory deprivation, edging and SM or role play. That’s what I can think of right now, the list can go a bit longer however haha.

Can you describe situations when you discovered your fetish for the first time?
As I have mentioned earlier it all started from an early age, when I was a child actually, I have always had something for latex medical gloves. Since I was a child, I was always trying to find some time or use for those sexy latex gloves, I was literally trying to find any excuse to put gloves on, and when not, I would just go to bed wearing gloves. I can’t remember much about how it felt the first time, because obviously that was ages ago, but I can always remember the satisfaction once they are on and how I keep admiring them, and not forgetting the scent of talcum powdered latex gloves.

How is the relation of your fetish to your sexuality? Does your fetish take place, apart from the sexual level, in your everyday-life?
This is actually a nice question. The relationship between my fetishes and sexuality is an integrative one. I can simply say my fetishes are what gets me going sexually, I can’t ever think about me having a vanilla fun, sex or whatever, it’s all about fetishes. Maybe I wouldn’t really show it in my every day life, but that’s just because it’s a bit difficult especially when it comes to rubber, the weather here is hot so, wearing rubber on a daily basis or outside, is not wise. However I can say I have done it for few days in a row before at winter time.

© Rubber Toy

What kind of conflicts did or do you have, during your journey through your fetish discovery?
Uhm, there are mainly two things I can talk about here. The first one is that the kinky scene is pretty dead in my area, it’s very hard to fine someone, who can at least be on the same page as me, you can imagine how it could feel being kind of alone through your journey especially, when it all just started and you are a newbie It feels like being lost in the middle of nowhere. The other thing, which is really connected to the first one, is being not into vanilla sex but only kinky play and this always felt like there was something wrong with me being different. Whenever I tell anyone that I’m not into vanilla sex and only into kinky sessions, they just wouldn’t understand me and I wouldn’t understand them as well, because of that I kept feeling like there was something wrong or something has to be changed but I also couldn’t change myself or how I feel. Luckily by keep talking to the community, meeting new people here and there, I came through my journey to the point where I’m today. I start meeting more people who are just like me, so I started to realize, that it’s normal. Every one is different and that’s normal.

© Rubber Toy

Please describe one of your hottest experiences concerning fetish you had so far?
That was one of my memorable experiences in life, so I went to Europe for the first time to Berlin by myself only. I stayed there for two weeks met new people and stuff like that so I had a lot of (first experience moments) there. One of them was going to a fetish club for the first time, that was just really something new and different for me.

You talked about your first visit in a fetish location in Berlin. Can you describe this visit? What did you expect, what did you fear? What surprised you?
Well, I wasn’t intended to go there anyway, I’m a bit shy in real life plus I was alone and I know nothing about the fetish clubs culture. But someone who is now a friend of mine kept telling me that I should go and he will be there later at some point too, again I wasn’t going until maybe the last few hours he texted me again and convinced me to do it, I was like I have nothing to lose and I never know when I could come to Berlin again, so let’s give that a try. I can’t say that I had any expectations as I literally didn’t know anything. My fear were that it could be dangerous plus the fact that I cannot speak German just in case, in additional to the fact that I’m shy so I was worried how I’ll interact with people there, turns out to be a very different crazy experience. That’s all what I can say here haha, it was amazing and different. Apparently nothing bad has happened.

© Rubber Toy

What are your next plans in terms of your fetish?
This can be a very long answer or just a short one. As I’m sure everyone of us has a lot of dreams and things they want to do especially when it comes to kinky lifestyle and how expensive it can be so you may have to make a list and work towards your goals. Though let me tell you a short term one and a long term one. First the short term goal: I cannot find a perfect tight catsuit for me in most of rubber shops and I have been wanting to get a m2m catsuit for a while, so the goal is going to a shop and get measured by them in order to get a m2m catsuit the next time I’m in Berlin. The long term goal: I have been dreaming about having my own well equipped play room, this is a hard one though as there should be the additional room in my place for that first, then working on the designing which I’m sure will need a lot of effort and accessories maybe, then the gear and equipment.

Thanks for this interview!

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(Interviewer: Michael)

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